The Passenger's Seat

I realize now that by having many more than four of you in my passengers’ seat, I am breaking the law. Quite fiercly, in fact. My bad. Let’s hope none of you are law officials. 

I got into service again today after visiting my family in the boondocks and I noticed I had recieved a voicemail from my place of employ- Panera Bread. It said “Paul…It’s now 3:10 and you were supposed to be here at 3:00. We’re all wondering where you are. Call us back when you get this.” Immediately I returned the call and explained that on the schedule I copied down, I was off and wasn’t due back in to work until tonight, the fifth. That I didn’t have cell service is why I didn’t answer the phone, and that I was much more than embarrassed and sorry. I would never have a no-call, no-show. It’s just not my style. 

I was informed that by not showing up and not calling back, I had given them the idea that I was never going to return, and that I needed to come back in on thursday to talk to THAT manager and see if I shall continue to work there- that all of my shifts for this week have been covered and I was off the schedule. 

I’m angry. Quite angry, in fact. But mainly I’m stressed out because I am, most likely, unemployed. Ugh. But, since I came back to town to work (which I won’t be doing), I’ll take this time to start sending out applications again, I suppose. bleh. 

Panera sucks. The first time I’ve missed, they just “assume” I’m not coming back. Ever. 

Awesome. 

Wish me luck, I suppose. 

Today was a wonderful day. I woke up at the asscrack of dawn, usually meaning the day will be rather unpleasant. Instead, my mother and I ended up cooking our independence day feast whilst singing Hakuna Matata and dancing around the kitchen for the amusement of our nephew and ourselves. My morning surlies were instantly thrown out the window. Also, blueberry pancakes were served before church. Delich. 
I guess I should start being worried about a carb. addiction, though.

After church more family started to pour in, including some of my favorite distant cousins who I hadn’t seen in quite some time. We visited as we barbiqued and swam around in a kiddy pool with some beer. It was nice. We had some mini karaoke  to some “go America songs,” but my mom correctly stated that they would never be as awesome as the Lion King soundtrack. She’s a smart one. Catches on quick.

We immediately went back to Just Can’t Wait to be King. Best possible finale? Oh yes. 

The fireworks then started. They were kind of mediocre…but it didn’t matter because everyone was eating and visiting and having a grand old time. My favorite cousin Cynthia couldn’t make it down. She said she was sick, but everybody is pretty sure that she just didn’t want to come down so she could have an “adult day” with her fiance. She sent her kids down with her sister Michelle, and that kinda pissed everybody off. But whatever. She really missed out on an excellent family event.

Jack- I’ve never heard of somebody requesting more mexican customers. This job you have must be quite unique. haha. Where do you work, exactly? You take the family portraits? Or the ones with the babies in all of the cute, different little poses? Whatever it is, I pray that you start getting more mexicans than you can ever dream of. I miss you a lot and would like to see you sometime soon. I mean, we do live in the same pace. It’s a little bit criminal that we don’t hang out more.
This time, I will take the blame. I’ll start trying a lot harder. Maybe you can take some photos of me. I’m not afraid to show some skin, so we can branch out your expertise- expand your portfolio. hahaha 

- Not pornographic ones, mind you. Clear your heads. I mean the classy, mildly modest kind. hah. :)

Denver- You need to be more present in my life as well. Every now and then I’ll get a slightly suggestive comment from you, but it’s just not enough to please! Either they need to happen more frequently, or they need to be more suggestive to make up for their few-and-far-between-lyness. Ya know?

How was everybody’s Forth? I hope it was wonderful and that you are all doing well.

Don’t forget to buckle up,

-p

I’ve been eating sandwiches for almost every meal for the last couple of months. Unhealthy amounts of sandwiches. Working at Panera Bread, I thought I would be sick of anything that ever even came into contact with yeast, but the opposite is true. I keep bringing home three loaves at a time and running out before I even realize it. I should probably have some variety, but they’re just so damn good. Yummyyummycarbohydrates.

Although I like the free food I get from work, I’ve recently started thinking about trying to become a Flight Attendant. I’ve been talking to a few stewards and stewardesses (stewardesses is the longest word in the english language that is typed using only the left hand, by the way) and it seems like a gig I’d really enjoy. Apparently you get paid pretty well because of the risk (I laugh in the face of danger), and you only work three-four days a week. PLUS you get free flights for yourself and your family. This means, on the days that I wouldn’t be jetting across the nation, I could be hanging out on the beach, or in the city. 
and those mini booze bottles are just too damn cute. 

I’m now down in the boondocks to have independence day celebrations with my family. At the risk of sounding like a spazoid, I’ll admit that REALLY I’m only in the same town as my family, because I want to go to the next town over and hang out with my ex-librarian. I will do this tomorrow afternoon. Sparklers are cool even in the day time. 

What are you all doing to celebrate? How has everybody been? Fill me in on your lives. I appologize for being so neglectful (yet again), but I’m seriously going to try to keep tumbler up this time. The letter format is my newest attempt at keeping myself faithful to you all, and the tumblerverse in general. If I can write letters in real life, I should be able to do it online. Theoretically.

Until next time,

-Pants

I have a crush on you. I could ask you out, and move on with my life if you said no. Or, we could be friends! See, I don’t want to consider that you might not be attracted to me. I’m scared of rejection, so I’ve decided relationships should grow smoothly out of friendships.

When you have problems, I’ll be there for you. Night after night. Selflessly. I’ll tear down the jerks you date, and wait for you to realize how good I am for you- that only I will ever understand you.

You won’t want to hurt my feelings and I won’t ever force the issue. I’ll tell myself it’s because I “value our friendship.” Bit by bit, I’ll make you depend on me. You’ll think about how long it would take to build this kind of connection again. And in a moment of weakness, and loneliness, you’ll give in.

It’ll feel comfortable and natural. You’ll quietly revise your definition of love and try to be happy.

And sometimes, you will be.

Only the wistfulness in your gaze and the tiny pause before you say, “I love you,” will hint that this wasn’t the ending you’d hoped for.

loganjack:

People I have nothing to tumble about.  No witty remarks on life or anecdotes from the day.  No ho ass pictures of myself to post.  What.

But i’m still sitting here.  Yeah just sitting.

Life in shambles.  ShAmBlEs

Life is hard sometimes.
I feel ya, shawty.

I feel like a boy.

No.

…
like a man.